Sunday, June 19, 2011

Family

Most of you know why I haven't posted on this blog for awhile. If you don't know, my Granddad passed away two weeks ago. He was an amazing man. Oddly enough, he actually died three other times in 1949 - he was pronounced dead three times after a plane crash. He was told he would never walk again, yet he did. He chased after three kids with a wooden leg. He worked hard every day of his life. He refused Disability until my dad (his youngest kid) was through with college. He passed away on June 9, with all of his immediate family at his side - his wife of more than 65 years, his three children, a daughter-in-law (my mom), and his two grandchildren. He died on the eve of the anniversary of his plane crash - 62 years. More than 100 people showed up for his service on the 16th. He was loved, respected, and admired by so many people.

Now, all seriousness aside, I must discuss family. Not the mushy stuff of perfect families, because let's be real - they only exist in Hollywood. I love my family, don't get me wrong. But like every family, there are members that "a little goes a long way".

My dad's sister flew in from Georgia the day before the passing. She only flies out to visit every couple years. I love her dearly, and I know she didn't used to be this way, but the woman sucks the air out of a room. She's utterly depressing. And annoying. I understand that she suffers from headaches (it runs in the family), and fibromyalgia. But there's a line, and she crossed it a long time ago. She made a point of telling us how expensive her plane ticket was to get out here. (Really? You're going to make that an issue when your dad is dying?) At one point she changed from real clothes to a long t-shirt dress/pajama thing, making the statement, "Wow, I've never been in real clothes that long." (insert crickets) Her and her husband didn't offer to help do anything. I really do mean anything. My parents got food and drinks for the wake, had about $300 worth of gas between hospital and home, cleaned house for Granny and did her laundry and ironing, found enough tables and chairs to set around the house for the wake. Not to mention helping Granny with the mortuary and the minister. My aunt, uncle, and cousin did nothing. My cousin did a few random things, but really, they were of no help. They mostly sat and watched everyone else work.

My dad's sister-in-law, his brother's wife, was a bitch. No other way to say it. We all know she didn't much care for her husband's parents, especially Granddad. She got all pissy because she was wearing a really nice pair of greyish/black jeans but my dad and another uncle (from above paragraph) were wearing slacks and uncle was wearing a tie. Really? I saw people at the service in extremely casual attire. I saw people all fancied up. As long as you're not in pajama's these days, we don't really give a shit. One morning, she woke up at 4am and marched out to the living room - where Granny and my cousin were sleeping. (Granny sleeps in her recliner because her back hurts her less than if she sleeps in her bed anymore). My aunt turns on the light in the kitchen, loudly makes a pot of coffee and ruins her Weight Watchers diet by munching on a bag of brownies that were left over from the wake. When both my cousin and Granny sit up when the light wakes them up, she actually put her finger to her lip in the "ssshhhh let's be quiet" sign. And she got all upset when she was told by my dad's brother how early they'd be leaving to go home, because she wouldn't be able to do her TJ Maxx run. (shakes head)

My cousin . . . she's a sweetheart, but lives in a delusional world. Weirdly enough she talks more like a valley girl than a girl who was raised her whole life in Georgia. She's a smart cookie, but is clueless about reality. I was spoiled rotten as a kid, but she really has been spoiled rotten. Her parents are always referred to as Mommy and Daddy. Before you ask, she's 21. She kind of has the attitude that it really is all about her. Her parents give her money and pay her college tuition, and she herself does not have a job. She had one with her church as a greeter or something. When that ended, I asked if she'd be looking for another job soon, and she said, "It's not like I needed the job." Hmmmm.  In the real world, you can't put babysitting on your resume. Job recruiters like to see work history. She thinks it will all fall into her lap after grad school. Who knows, maybe it will; maybe she'll be one of those really lucky college grads. Now, I'm not jealous that I couldn't have that kind of life when I was in college, but it just irks me because I went to school with kids like that, and it just pissed me off. I worked hard and I'm proud of my job history and my employers have always liked what they saw. And in each case it was that previous job history that got me the job.

I adore my family, we are fairly close and I enjoy getting to see them. But a little goes a long way with some of them. I'm glad my aunt was able to fly in with enough time to say good-bye to her dad. I'm glad my cousin drove down after her last final of the term so she could say good-bye to our Granddad. I'm glad my uncle flew out for the funeral.

But sometimes, I just wonder where their heads are. Ya know?

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